​Have you ever experienced a set-back which puts you behind with your training?  To read more about falling off the fitness wagon, click here.   I recently had a relapse, which meant that the weight loss and fitness goals I worked towards in 2018 were nearly completely undone.  While this was very upsetting and it was difficult to get on the horse again, I am determined to develop a positive mindset and continue with my fitness journey. 

I have set myself some awesome new fitness goals to help me give me greater focus.  Since we are nearly half way through 2019, this is a good opportunity to look back at the goals that I set myself for this year, re-evaluate and re-define them.
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•          Continue to attend Les Mills Howick – While I wasn’t well I put my gym membership on hold, but now that I’m feeling better, I’ll continue to go to Les Mills Howick every morning and train as usual.  At the moment, I’m focussing on strength training and classes to help me improve on my fitness
•          PT with Alice Jackson at LM Howick – While I wasn’t well, I put PT on hold but I’ve recently started seeing Alice every week to help me work towards my fitness goals
•          Sri Chinmoy 10k race 15 September 2019 – As with the other Sri Chinmoy races during winter, this takes place in the beautiful Auckland Domain.  Last year, I competed in two 10k Sri Chinmoy races during winter even though I was very overweight, but this year I have decided to continue with my own training throughout winter and invest my energy into preparing for the final race in the Auckland Domain, which takes place on the 15th of September, which happens to be my birthday.  This may be a bit over-ambitious but it would be great if I could achieve a time as close to an hour as possible.
•          Introduce swimming into my training programme – As my goal for the summer is to be able to compete in swim and run events such as Stroke and Stride, I thought it would be a good idea to start integrating swimming into my fitness regime from now so I can gradually work on increasing distances and speed.  I won a free one month’s membership to The Olympic in Newmarket, which has a fantastic 50m indoor swimming pool (pictured above).  Unfortunately, it’s a bit far to travel there from Manukau every day, so I’ve decided to make use of the great pool in Otara instead, which is much closer to home.
•          Compete in Park Run at Barry Curtis Park – Back in January, I went along to the 5k Park Run at Barry Curtis Park in Flat Bush.  For those who haven’t heard of it, Park Run is a free 5k run which takes place world-wide.  Don’t be fooled by the distance!  It’s a challenging 5k event.  The course at Barry Curtis is mixed terrain – concrete, gravel and grass, with both flat and hilly surfaces.  This will be a great way to train for swim and run events such as Stroke and Stride, which I hope to compete in during the summer, as the run distances are typically between 3-5k.
•          Compete in swim and run events – As discussed in a previous blog post, I became very interested in competing in a swim and run event last summer.  Unfortunately, I didn’t manage to do this but after much consideration, I have decided to focus on these events rather than 10k races this summer.  I have been training for and competing in 10k events during the past decade and I’m getting a bit bored.  I love the idea of a new challenge.  Ocean swimming is completely new to me and the mix of swimming followed by a run will definitely push me outside my comfort zone.
•          Compete in some YMCA 10k Summer Series races – Competing in the YMCA 10k Summer Series events, which take place in the Auckland Domain every Thursday from the beginning until the end of daylight saving, isn’t high on my list of fitness priorities this year given that my main focus will be on swim and run events.  However, I will certainly try and make it to a few of these if I can.  I may do just the 5k option, given that the run distances for swim and run are between 3 and 5ks, which is considerably less than 10k.

As I have mentioned in a previous post, PT has helped me tremendously during my weight loss journey.  I see a lovely young girl called Alice Jackson at Les Mills in Howick for an hour every week.  I was reluctant to retain a trainer as I’ve always preferred to train myself when I used to be in shape, but I was determined to lose a very large amount of weight and desperately needed support.  As my weight crept up towards 100 kg, my diabetes was spiralling out of control and I was worried that I’d end up on insulin.  I was – and still am – determined to control my condition without meds for the rest of my life which Stephen Farrell, the head coach of the North Harbour Triathlon Club, assured me was possible when he rang me to answer my questions about the Takapuna Beach Swim and Run event which I’d like to enter next week .  Returning to the subject of PT, I also wanted to complete the YMCA 10k Summer Series, which started in October and you can read about in my earlier blog post.  I was very lucky to do a couple of training sessions with Alice’s brother Dan Jackson, who is also a trainer at the same gym.   Dan stepped in to train me while Alice was on holiday for three weeks in August last year.  By complete fluke, he competed in the YMCA 10k Series while he was a student at the prestigious Auckland Grammar School, so he knew what was required to get me into shape so I would be ready to start the series at the beginning of October.  Les mills isn’t just like a family.  As I discovered, some of the staff members actually are family, like Alice and Dan.  If you put a foot wrong, you’ll soon have to find yourself another gym. 

Over the past six months, I lost a total of 25 kg and completed the first half of the YMCA 10k Series, which I wouldn’t have been able to achieve training on my own.  I think of PT as the grease which makes my training flow.  You can read the thank you letter I wrote Les Mills Howick here.

Benefits of personal training include:

•          Regular check-ins with an exercise professional
•          Extra motivation and support
•          Training programmes tailored to your goals
•          Assistance to address injuries and a rehabilitation plan

If you’re thinking about hiring a trainer, here are some of my tips:

•          Think of PT as an investment in your health rather than an expense
•          While some trainers may be a better fit than others (personality, specialisation etc), everyone at a gym like Les Mills is highly qualified so it probably doesn’t matter too much who you train with.  I made a decision fairly quickly based on the recommendation of an instructor on the gym floor because I didn’t want to waste time getting started.  Besides, Alice is a nice person and I really liked her
•          Your PT is willing to help you, but first you have to want to be helped and you have to be prepared to help yourself.  A lot of it is up to you!
•          Don’t have unrealistic expectations of your trainer.  They are highly educated but you can’t expect them to know the answer to all of your personal problems.  In my case, I had to do a lot of thinking on my own beforehand to come up with a strategy to address the impact that medication for schizophrenia was having on my weight, which I wouldn’t expect anyone at the gym to be able to help me with because not even the doctors I have seen over the past eight years were able to assist with this. 
•          Don’t get distracted by what other people at the gym are doing or what they look like.  Focus on yourself as this is your special time
•          While PT has helped me tremendously what matters most is what you’re doing and eating outside that time.  You must be prepared to make a lifestyle change and be committed to training and eating well. Unfortunately, you can’t pay a trainer to exercise for you! If you’re not making progress, you can’t blame someone you see for only an hour every week
•          In my experience, for PT to work, you need to get on well with your trainer but at the same time maintain a professional distance so you listen to them and do what they tell you.  If you’re too chummy, it simply won’t work.  It’s a bit like getting your parents to teach you how to drive, which is never a good idea.  That’s why I don’t train with my best friend Miriam Ismail, who is a PT at the gym in Drury.  Alice and I are close but I don’t go around to her house for dinner
•        Finally, a little note for the lawyers out there.  If you want to talk shop or find someone who understands your lifestyle, you can always try and find a PT who is an ex-lawyer. They do exist!  An example is Sankha Peiris who also works out of Les Mills in Howick.

​As I mentioned in a previous blog post, I have managed to make a lot of progress during my weight loss journey over the past six months, losing a total of 25 kg.  I go to Les Mills in Howick and it’s a great gym.  I simply love it there.  I wanted to share the letter I recently wrote to the team, thanking them for all their support.

28 October 2018

To the team at Les Mills Howick,

A small gift from our garden – some plants and produce

I wanted to thank you all so much for helping me along my fitness journey.  When I (re)joined the gym in July this year, I was 93.3 kg.  Over the past four months, I have lost over 20 kg.  My goal was to be able to participate in the YMCA 10k summer series in the Auckland Domain every Thursday, which I have achieved thanks to weekly PT sessions with Alice, as well as some training with Dan while Alice was away. 

I have Type 2 diabetes, but with the support of this gym, I have been able to get my condition under control through diet and exercise.  Losing weight has made it easier to manage my blood sugars.  My GP didn’t recognise me when I saw him last Friday and was so happy with my progress.

A lot of people have asked how I managed to lose so much weight in a relatively short time frame. The truth is that there was no fad dieting or excessive exercise involved.  I’m also carrying a few injuries, which restricts what I can do.  There are a few revelations I have had that I would like to share, which might be useful to pass on to other gym members who are struggling to lose weight.

•          A lot of it is in the mind.  In order to lose weight, you have to develop the right mind set.  It took me awhile to get to this place
•          It mostly comes down to food.  As the saying goes, you can’t out train a bad diet!
•          You need to be disciplined with exercise and have self-control with food
•          You need a calorie deficit in order to lose weight (logging my food intake and exercise with My Fitness Pal has helped me achieve this)
•          Gym staff are very willing to help you, but first you have to want to be helped and you have to be prepared to help yourself
•          PT has helped me tremendously but what matters most is what you’re doing and eating outside that time.  While some trainers may be a better fit than others (personality, specialisation etc), everyone at the gym is highly qualified and I respect you all.  If people are not making progress, they can’t blame someone they see for only an hour each week! 

Everyone – the friendly reception staff, fitness instructors on the gym floor, group fitness instructors and personal trainers – have been absolutely fantastic.  In particular, I’d like to say a special thank you to Autumn (who signed me up and continues to check in with me), Laura and Laetitia (who has since moved on) for helping me so much the first time I joined and who made me want to return so I could try again, Alice and Dan for motivating me through PT, Brandon for his support on the gym floor and Maureen, who has given me so much support in her classes and with my running.  You’re all doing a wonderful job.  Please keep it up!  Thank you again.  I look forward to getting to know even more of you over time.

Kind regards,

Anita Kundu

Running is an important part of my life.  It helps hold me together as a person.  I underestimated its power when I developed schizophrenia at the age of 29, as anti-psychotic drugs caused tremendous weight gain, impeding my ability and desire to continue running.    As I have previously mentioned, this season I have been competing in the YMCA 10k Summer Series held in the Auckland Domain.  The YMCA is Auckland’s premier marathon running club, but runs a series of weekly 10k races between September (when daylight savings begin) until April (when daylight savings ends) every year. There is a 5k option too and walkers are welcome.  The entry fee is $5, payable on the day.  The course is difficult, much more so than the Sri Chinmoy series also held in the Domain during winter.  The series is divided into two parts.  Part I took place between 4 October and 20 December 2018.  There is a short break over the Christmas and New Year’s period.  Part II takes place between 10 January and 4 April 2019 and kicks off again tonight.  I can’t wait to get back into it! 

I thought this would be a good time to reflect on the series so far and provide a snapshot of my progress throughout the season.  The YMCA 10k series has been an important part of my weight loss journey.  I need to run in order to lose weight, but I also need to lose weight in order to improve my running. It is all very circular!  When I first started competing in the series in early October, I was 76 kg.  Half way through, I’m currently sitting at 69.1 kg.  My weight is approximately 10 kg heavier than my optimum running weight, so I certainly don’t expect to achieve my best 10k times.  A part of me does wish that I was at goal weight at the start of the series and could run a perfect series without any injuries or interruptions, but I don’t know what world I was living in as this is completely unrealistic.  The reasons I chose to compete in the events were the same as the reasons that I outlined for entering the swim and run held at Takapuna Beach next week, which I covered in my previous blog post.

The runs are all officially timed by marshalls from the YMCA and runners are ranked, but I like to think that I’m competing against myself, striving to better my PB, rather than out to beat anyone else.  For me, the other runners are there for motivation and support.  Racing has the added advantage of really pushing you.  My times for races are almost always better than those for training runs.  It’s a nice little community which unites people with a passion for running.  I finally feel that I have found my people.  Anyone is welcome, but the majority of participants are marathon runners who have been part of the YMCA for years.  The people are so lovely that I would ordinarily be tempted to join the club and run with them on Sunday mornings, but the YMCA is a marathon running club.  Their Sunday runs vary in distance, but are typically geared towards long-distance runners.  Those days are long over for me.  As regular readers of my blog will be aware, I consider myself a 10k runner these days.  It’s a shame, as there are some incredibly inspiring people who are part of the YMCA who I might never have the chance to meet.  On their Facebook page, I noticed that they were looking for someone to run with a blind man who is training for the New York Marathon, which made me take a hard look at my attitude towards my health issues and life generally.  I actually feel quite ashamed for making a mountain of my problems when in fact there are others out there who are worse off than I am.  Having completed one marathon myself (London 2008), I know just how difficult they are, even if you can see.  Also, he’s going to New York.  Most people would probably think “what’s the point of going to New York, it’s not like I can see anything there!”

There were 11 races in the first half of the series.  Here is a little summary of my times for each race:

•          Race 1: 1 hour 14 minutes 56 seconds
•          Race 2: 1 hour 12 minutes 5 seconds
•          Race 3: 1 hour 11 minutes 36 seconds
•          Race 4: 1 hour 12 minutes 12 seconds
•          Race 5: 1 hour 7 minutes 7 seconds
•          Race 6: 1 hour 8 minutes 46 seconds
•          Race 7: 1 hour 7 minutes 14 seconds
•          Race 8: 1 hour 5 minutes 10 seconds
•          Race 9: 1 hour 4 minutes 9 seconds
•          Race 10: 1 hour 4 minutes 29 seconds
•          Race 11: 1 hour 2 minutes 42 seconds
•          Race 12: Did not compete (went away on holiday early)

​As you can see, over the course of Part I, I have generally improved and gotten faster.  My goal is to bring my time below an hour by the end of Part II.  I’ll follow up with a further post in April which summarises my progress and thoughts for the second half of the series.

Some people are very forward-thinking.  I’m one of them.  I’m always thinking ahead to what events I might like to compete in next summer, so I can use the winter more effectively to steer my training in the right direction.  As you might be aware from my previous blog posts, I am a keen road runner.   I’m currently participating in the YMCA 10k Summer Series, which I am really enjoying.  I also swim seasonally, in summer when the 50m local outdoor swimming pool opens.  For most of my childhood I was a competitive swimmer and part of the Whangarei Swimming Club.  For many years, I’ve been aware of Stroke N’ Stride, a series of events held annually in Auckland, comprising an ocean swim followed by a short run.  I didn’t plan to get into multi-sport; my interest evolved organically and I can sort of see how this happened. However, this wasn’t something I was in a place to do in recent years. For most of my 30s, I battled obesity and ill health due to taking the anti-psychotic drugs I was prescribed when I was diagnosed with schizophrenia.  It’s only in the past six months that I have had a breakthrough in both my mental and physical health.  As mentioned in a previous post, I came up with the idea of running a course of meds for a fortnight at six monthly intervals, to see if I could pre-empt the onset of psychosis rather than taking meds all the time, which I fortunately don’t have to do as I only suffer from mild schizophrenia.  I did this last year in June and again in mid-December.  It might be too soon to say whether this works in the long run but it seems promising.  I haven’t had a psychotic episode since February last year, which was before I thought of this strategy.  Normally they’re spaced together more closely than that.  Thanks to my trainer Alice Jackson at Les Mills in Howick, I managed to lose 25 kg.  This has opened up a lot of opportunities for me, including participating in an event like swim and run as I wouldn’t have previously been fit enough to complete the course. 

I want a little taster to see if it’s for me or not, so I know whether it’s something I might like to commit to in the future. So, to test the waters (swimming pun intended), I’ve decided to head over to Takapuna Beach next Wednesday 16th January and participate in the North Harbour Triathlon Club’s Swim and Run series event, comprising a 500m ocean swim followed by a 4k beach run.  It’s not very far away at all (the date of the event, that is, not Takapuna, which is on the other side of Auckland) so I’ve been flat out over the past week bringing myself up to speed with what the event will entail and organising appropriate gear.  To help others who are also considering competing in swim and run events, I thought I’d write a blog post about things to consider before competing in such an event and follow it up with a further post afterwards to report back on my experience.

What is it?
A swim and run is, like the name suggests, a swim immediately followed by a run.  Note that “Swim and Run” should not be confused with “Swimrun”, which is quite different.  The latter refers to an intrepid event with a mixture of swimming and running intermittently.  You run wearing shoes (even during the swimming parts!) and usually compete with a partner as it’s largely an exercise in teamwork.  Breca is an example of Swimrun.

Why am I doing this?

•          I love pushing myself out of my comfort zone and challenging myself
•          It’s something a bit different
•          While I want to continue with my weight loss journey, I need a distraction.  Standing on the scales all the time will drive me nuts!
•          I’m getting bored competing in 10k races all the time , which I’ve been doing for the past eight years.  I’m a fairly stable person.  I don’t chop and change all the time but I think the 10k has run its course for me (running pun intended)
•          If you’ve been competing in the same discipline for a long time you eventually plateau and reach a point where you can’t improve anymore
•          I love being outdoors.  It’s summer at the moment in New Zealand, which makes training outdoors very pleasant
•          Training for an event motivates you to push yourself further
•          There is a lot of support.  I have been in contact with Stephen Farrell, the head coach of the North Harbour Triathlon Club, as I had a few questions and he was so encouraging and welcoming
•          There is a really sense of community at these events, which bring together some incredibly inspiring and lovely people
•          If you become a regular, you end up forming some amazing friendships and there is the potential for finding a training partner (and possibly even a life one)
•          Long term, I’d like to reduce the amount of running I do as I’m concerned about the impact on the joints.  Swimming is a great exercise to introduce to the mix, as it’s lower impact

What you’ll need

•          A swimsuit (and a wetsuit if you prefer) suitable for ocean swimming.  Wearing a wetsuit is definitely warmer as the ocean can be freezing even in the middle of summer.  The ones at Swim T3, where I went today to get the gear I needed for the race, weren’t a good fit so I’ll be swimming in togs along with the rest of the 10% of participants.  Wearing a wetsuit has the advantage of helping with buoyancy but it does make the transition longer (see below).  If you don’t want to buy a wetsuit, it may be possible to hire one where you live
•          Goggles.  Ocean swimming goggles are better than pool goggles, as you have better peripheral vision
•          A swimming cap
•          Running shoes are optional for the beach run.  Some competitors prefer to run in bare feet.  I’ll be wearing shoes because: (i) I find running along the beach in bare feet hard on the lower back; and (ii) I have diabetes and have to take care of my feet.  I can’t risk getting a cut from broken shells and glass lying along the beach because it could easily become infected.  I don’t want a foot to end up being amputated!

The transition
In multi-sport, you need to allow time for the transition.  In this case, when you finish the ocean swim you’ll need to remove your wetsuit (if you’re wearing one) and put on your running shoes for the beach run (if you choose to wear them).

Some useful links
Swim T3 (Auckland’s leading swimming retailer, to cover all your gear needs for both pool and ocean swimming): https://www.swimt3.co.nz/
Rick Wells Swimming squad (trains at the Newmarket Olympic Pool): https://www.rickwells.co.nz/
Takapuna beach series (beach run and ocean swim events held at Takapuna Beach): https://beachseries.co.nz/home/
Summer Swim (weekly ocean swims in Kohimarama on Thursdays from November until March): https://www.summerswim.co.nz/
Stroke N’ Stride (a series of swim and run events which take normally place in Mission bay during summer but are not being held this season): http://swimrun.org/
Splash and Dash (Swim and Run events that take place in Wellington): https://splashanddash.co.nz/
Ocean swim squad weekly clinics on Saturdays: https://www.oceanclinics.co.nz/
Ocean swimming guide: https://beachseries.co.nz/ocean-swim-guide/​

When I (re)joined Les Mills (New Zealand’s leading gym) in July this year, I was 93.3 kg.  Over the past four months, I have lost over 20 kg.  My goal was to be able to participate in the YMCA 10k summer series in the Auckland Domain every Thursday, which I have achieved thanks to support from my PT, a young girl called Alice at Les Mills in Howick.  I also benefitted from some training sessions with Alice’s brother Dan, who is also a trainer at the gym, while she was on holiday.

I have Type 2 diabetes, but I have been able to get my condition under control through diet and exercise.  Losing weight has made it easier to manage my blood sugars and my last HbA1c test was very good.  My GP didn’t recognise me when I last saw him and was so happy with my progress.  He said I definitely don’t need to be on medication for diabetes, which made me very happy.

Recently, I hit a bit of a plateau and progress has somewhat slowed down, but since embarking on this journey, I have never actually gained weight.  I have fitted training around two injuries (neck/tight trapezius and a sore wrist/tight forearms) and being busy around the garden (which hasn’t helped my injuries).  I would like to lose another 10 kg but haven’t set a time frame.  I managed to get myself out of the danger zone for diabetes and my overall health quite quickly, so I’m content to continue to chip away at my weight at my own pace, no matter how long it takes.  Now that it’s spring, I have been doing a lot more in the garden.  The extra activity has made me hungrier.  As a consequence, I have been consuming more food.  With my current injuries, I don’t want to exercise more as it will make things worse.  I just need to be careful that calories consumed don’t exceed what I expend, so I can continue to lose weight.

A lot of people have asked how I managed to lose so much weight in a relatively short time frame. The truth is that there was no fad dieting or excessive exercise involved.  I generally do an hour of exercise every day, which also helps me control diabetes.  My injuries restrict what I can do.  At the moment, I do one 10k run (the race) and one PT session per week; the other days I just go for a walk.  There are a few revelations I have had along the way that I would like to share, which might be useful to others who are struggling to lose weight.

·         A lot of it is in the mind.  In order to lose weight, you have to develop the right mind set.  It took me awhile to get to this place
·         It mostly comes down to food.  As the saying goes, you can’t out train a bad diet!
·         You need to be disciplined with exercise and have self-control with food
·         You need a calorie deficit in order to lose weight (logging my food intake and exercise with My Fitness Pal has helped me achieve this)
·         Gym staff are very willing to help you, but first you have to want to be helped and you have to be prepared to help yourself
·         PT has helped me tremendously but what matters most is what you’re doing and eating outside that time.  While some trainers may be a better fit than others (personality, specialisation etc), everyone at a gym like Les Mills is highly qualified and deserves respect.  If people are not making progress, they can’t blame someone they see for only an hour each week!
​
Remember that you’re a person, not a machine.  Your fitness journey doesn’t operate in a vacuum. You have to live in this world, go about daily life and have relationships with others.  It’s not quite as simple as energy in, energy out.  People have feelings.  External factors such as stress and sleep can affect your weight. Travel can disrupt your routine.  Injuries can inhibit movement.  But by developing sound eating and training principles, it really is possible to shift excess weight.  If I managed to, so can you.

It has been awhile since I’ve blogged about my fitness journey so I thought this would be a good opportunity to bring you all up to date with what I have been doing recently.  You may recall me mentioning in this post that I managed to make quite a bit of progress in terms of weight loss last summer, bringing my weight down from 93kg to 78kg.  Unfortunately, I was unable to maintain that weight as I had a relapse.  Having to take medication again increased my weight but I cannot blame that alone.  I felt depressed by the weight gain and compounded to the problem by eating badly, and before I knew it my weight had risen to 94kg!  I dread winter.  I hate cold weather and found it difficult to be motivated enough to run outdoors.  In addition, I also hated the gym that I had joined back in January, and as a result, hardly went there.   While it is fairly close to home, if you don’t like it, you simply won’t go there, even if it’s next door.  Period.

As I grew bigger and lost more and more fitness, I became increasingly depressed.  I have Type 2 diabetes, which I am meant to control with diet and exercise.  As my eating fell to the wayside, I stopped testing my blood sugar, choosing to live in oblivion.  I knew something had to change, but I felt stuck in a cycle of losing weight, only to gain it all back every time I had a relapse and had to go on medication.  It then became hard for me to start my fitness journey all over again as I felt so disappointed by having gained weight.  However, this is the reality of my life, and probably much better than having to take medication all the time, which only caused my weight to continue to climb.  I thought about my problem very deeply and realised that the thing that frustrated me most was that my base weight was so high, and it was very hard for me to bring it down due to fluctuations every time I had a relapse and had to take risperidone.  The reason for this is because when I worked as a lawyer at Bell Gully a couple of years ago, I had to take my medication continuously in order to hold down the job.  This pushed my base weight from 70 kg to 93 kg, and I have never been able to bring my weight down to this level ever since. My ideal or goal weight is actually 60 kg, but I’ve allowed a 10kg buffer because of my condition and the effect medication has on my weight.  So in an ideal world I’d be 60kg, and allow a buffer of 10kg for weight gain caused by relapses and the medication.

I was pleased that I was able to lose 15 kg on my own last summer, without a gym or PT, but realised that if I were to try to push past the barrier and bring my weight down to 70kg or below that level, I would not be able to do it on my own.  Part of the problem was that I wasn’t getting enough support from the community gym which I was going to, but linked to that was also the fact that I was not forthcoming about my situation because I didn’t feel comfortable confiding in the instructors there. However I cannot solely blame them.  I needed to want to be helped, if that makes sense.  It took some time for me to reach that point.

A few years ago, I trained at Les Mills and used the Howick branch a lot, as it is close to home.  I met a wonderful young trainer called Laetitia.  I confided in her about my condition and the problems it presented in terms of my weight and she was wonderfully supportive.  However, after a particularly bad depressive episode I left the gym, which was probably one of the biggest mistakes I have made in my life, as my health and weight have deteriorated ever since. 
I was determined to pick myself up again, but this time around, I knew I could not do it alone as I had done last summer.  I constantly thought back to Les Mills Howick and how much I enjoyed going there.  The trainers and fitness instructors were all so wonderful to me and I felt happy to go to the gym, which wasn’t the way I felt about the community gym.  One of the instructors at the community gym always put me down in the Combat class, getting off the stage to come over to correct me on my movements.  I always felt self-conscious infront of the other gym goers, which was one of the reasons I went to the gym less and less over the course of my membership.  I couldn’t complain to the manager about him as he was the manager! 

I had to accept that this time, I needed to see a personal trainer, which was hard for me as I’m a self-starter and believe firmly in helping myself in order to get ahead in life.  Over the years though, I’ve learnt that there’s no shame in asking for help when you need it, and it’s certainly better than struggling on your own or giving up.  Deep down, I desperately wanted to do the YMCA 10k summer series in the Auckland Domain, which starts in October and I knew I’d never get there if I continued to go it alone.  Last summer, I just did a couple of the runs, this summer, I’d like to do the entire series, which starts when daylight saving commences in October and runs until April, when daylight saving ends.  To run with the pack, I need to be able to complete the course in  no more than an hour and a half (the course is quite difficult and contains a lot of hills, so this needed to be taken into account).

The more I thought about Les Mills the more I realised that it was the right gym for me, if ever there was one.  I simply had to put aside my insecurities about being an ‘older’ member if I was to improve my health and fitness.  I picked up the phone and asked if I could go into Les Mills Howick and talk to someone about rejoining the gym.  The next day, I started going to the gym and working out on a trial membership thanks to a consultant called Autumn and before I knew it, I had rejoined the gym.  There were some familiar faces and a lot of new ones as well.  Since I had last been a member, they had upgraded the facilities so the gym was even better than I had remembered it!  Unfortunately, Laetitia didn’t work there anymore (but she does work out there and it was lovely to see her again).  Funnily enough, I ended up picking a lovely young PT called Alice that is really good friends with her.  Her manner reminded me so much of Laetitia’s and that’s why I chose her.  Since I started going to Les Mills, I have lost 4.5 kg in just three weeks.  I have also gotten back into running 10ks, my most recent race being the Sri Chinmoy in the Auckland Domain last Sunday.  I managed to complete the race in 1 hour 29 minutes (but the course is much easier than the YMCA 10k run which has more hills so I have quite a bit of work to do!).  Initially, I was reluctant to enter into races when my times were so slow, but one of the fitness instructors called Maureen who also does 10k races encouraged me to enter in order to improve my fitness.  There is another Sri Chinmoy race on the 16th September, which I’ll enter as well. I loved how supportive the other runners were during the race and afterwards.  Considering how many times I have fallen down (one time quite literally, during a run along the waterfront), I need all the support I can get to pick myself up again and carry on.

I now exercise every day (which I didn’t do from February through to June).  I do three 10k runs per week, sometimes going to the Newmarket branch of Les Mills so I can run in the Auckland Domain.  I see Alice for PT once a week for an hour, and do another hour of weight training on my own during the week.  For the other two days, I do classes.  At the moment, I’ve been doing RPM with Kate and Pump with Stacy, who are both really lovely instructors who remember me from the last time I went to Les Mills Howick, and also from other gyms before that.  The Saturday before last, Alice and I did George’s boxing class together, which I really enjoyed.  Who knew exercising could be so much fun!

In parallel with exercise, I also keep a record of everything I consume on an app called My Fitness Pal.  It’s been around for a long time, but I didn’t use it as I used to do Weight Watchers in order to control my weight.  Unfortunately, Weight Watchers doesn’t work for me anymore.  I have diabetes, so fruit most definitely isn’t free as per Weight Watchers, because it contains quite a bit of sugar.  They have changed the programme so much over the years and added lots more zero points foods, especially those which are high in protein such as chicken, fish, tofu and eggs.  I don't really agree with this.  To me, nothing is free.  Everything has some kind of value in terms of calories and macros, and therefore has an effect on your body.  In saying that, I have developed a lot of good habits from doing Weight Watchers over the years, including weighing food to ensure I am not overeating.  There are certainly some similarities between the two programmes, one being that you must record everything that you eat.  What I like about MFP is that you record calories, rather than points, which to me seem rather artificial. I think counting calories is a more accurate way of measuring what you’re consuming.   MFP also places an emphasis on macros, so if you enter the foods you’ve been eating across the day and corresponding quantities, it will give you the content of protein, carbs, fats, sugars and so on.  Unlike Weight Watchers, I find this very useful, especially for controlling my blood sugar levels.  I have been testing my blood sugar regularly and my levels have never been better!  Although it sounds quite tedious to have to log everything you eat and all the activity you’ve done for the day, it actually isn’t as bad as it sounds.  Once you enter items, they will automatically be stored in the system, making it easy to add them next time.  The app (or I’ll often just use the website and work on my laptop) is very easy to use and MFP is a very supportive community of members, a lot like Weight Watchers.  You can become friends with other members, see their food diaries and interact with others on the forum.  I’ve had some queries about MFP and other members were most helpful in answering my questions. 

It is early days yet but I am determined to make this work long term.  That’s why I’m not following fad diets such as Keto or doing intermittent fasting which to me is just a form of starvation.  Hopefully, with the help of a PT, I’ll be able to get back on the horse after relapses occur.  I do hope they won’t – I’m trialling something new where I take my medication pre-emptively for a period of two weeks every six months or so to try and prevent the onset of psychosis – but it will be awhile until I determine whether that method works or not.  In any event, losing some weight, improving my fitness level and being back with old friends at the gym has certainly made me happier and lifted my spirits.  Given my battle with depression, this reason alone, nevermind diabetes, is enough incentive for me to continue on my journey.

Once you set a fitness goal and are working towards it, whether it be to lose weight or run a half marathon, you can get into the zone and make rapid progress.  However, problems can arise during your fitness journey.  Unfortunately, it’s never quite smooth sailing.  In a previous blog post, I have covered the dreaded fitness plateau.  I have also talked a bit about some of the injuries I have had which impaired my ability to train.  In this post, I would like to cover how you can redeem yourself when you fall off the fitness wagon.  This happened to me recently.  By opening up about why I derailed and how I managed to get myself back on track I hope to reach out to others who have been in the same situation.

As you may recall from my earlier blog post, I was making excellent progress during my weight loss journey and managed to drop from 93 kg to 78 kg by running 10k three times a week.  I even managed to do a couple of 10k runs in the YMCA’s summer series in the Auckland Domain.  All was going well until I fell ill.  As those of you that have been dipping into the “Mind” section of In the Circle may be aware, I suffer from schizophrenia.  Medication didn’t work out for me because it caused excessive weight gain and Type 2 diabetes, so I control my condition naturally.  But when relapses occur, I do go back on medication and that causes me to gain weight. While I’m unwell, I don’t exercise.  In two months, I went from being able to handle running a flat 10k course in one hour and ten minutes to barely being able to walk the same distance.  Every time I fall ill my eating also goes out the window and I start eating a lot of junk food.  Thankfully, I wasn’t quite back to my starting weight but when I got weighed at the doctors, I discovered that I’m now 88kg.  This is frustrating as it puts me forward 10kg.

 For a long time, I felt so angry and depressed but I finally managed to get my act together thanks to the support of my cousin’s wife, who is a personal trainer.  While she was a student at the fitness academy where she trained to become a personal trainer, she trained me and is familiar with my condition.  Miriam’s advice was to start by walking the 10k course and alternate by doing weights at the gym every second day.  She said to concentrate on how good it will feel to run again.

Try not to make the same mistake as me and fall into a downward spiral.  It’s best to nip it in the bud and pick yourself back up as quickly as you can, otherwise it will mean even more work for you in the future!

For me, the key was not to ruminate on the past and how much progress I had previously made.  Once I learnt to put the past behind me, I could concentrate on the journey back to a fitness level I was happy with.  Indeed, I have learnt to actually embrace and enjoy my current journey back to health.

It helps if you can come up with an action plan going forwards.  Even though the way forward to running again was very  obvious (starting off by walking again), it took someone else (a personal trainer no less) to point out to me that that was what I should be doing.  I’m a bit of a self-starter and enjoy exercising alone, but if you need extra support and motivation, it might be a good idea to see a personal trainer for awhile so you get back on track.

Focus on the end goal.  If it’s weight loss, try not to become obsessed with a particular number but think of how good it will feel to be lighter and have more energy.  In my case, the end result is being able to run which really is the best feeling in the world.  As Miriam said, that should motivate me every time I am doing my 10k walks.

In summary, try not to feel too depressed or beat yourself up if you fell off the wagon.  We’re all human and it happens even to the most dedicated athletes.  Try to focus on getting back on track.  Your body will thank you for it.